Friday, October 21, 2011

Squirrels with Mushroom Sauce

Scott and I have implemented a monthly meal plan in our house (inspired by the lovely Katherine over at The Katherine Wheel) - more on that process later!

It's been fabulous -  for me and Scott.  The kids are still in mourning over the loss of their favorite dinner staple of "yellow pasta" (boxed penne with butter and parmesan).  What can I say, they've grown very attached over the past few years months.

Anyhoo, the other night we had frozen chicken patty sandwiches.  Nothing fancy, but hey, something different!  The boys were moaning and groaning about it.  "I no like chicken sandwiches!"  "I no want eat chicken sandwiches!"  "I want yellow pasta!"

Scott finally had enough and yelled "For God's sake, it's a giant CHICKEN NUGGET!"

(They didn't buy it.)

Ashley also had an epiphany during that same dinner.  "Hey mommy!  Did you know there's the chicken at the farm and then the chicken that we eat!  Two kinds of chicken!  With the same name!"

Maybe nicer mothers would have shielded her a bit longer from the cold reality that the chicken from the farm IS the chicken that we eat.  But I just laid it out there for her.  She took it well.

So well, in fact, that I didn't shield them the next night either when they started complaining about lasagna.  Lasagna, for crying out loud!  It is noodles, cheese and sauce.

Aidan said "I don't like basagna."  I said "Yes, you do, it's yellow pasta.  There's yellow pasta in it!"  But Aidan held strong.  "I just eat the yellow pasta part."  And then he picked off the cheese.

What?!  What kid refuses melted cheese?*  Craziness.

Anyway, I got frustrated, so I announced "You guys don't even know how lucky you are.  I watched a TV show last night about zombies and the only thing the people found to eat one night was SQUIRRELS and MUSHROOMS."

The kids looked horrified.  Scott gave me a stern look.  But I was undeterred.

"Mommy, why did they eat squirrels and mushrooms?" asked Ashley.

"Because the zombies took over the world and the people were hiding in the woods and the only thing they could find to eat was squirrels," I replied.

"And mushrooms," added Ashley.

"Yes," I said.  "And I'm not even going to tell you what the zombies ate."

Scott looked at me really sternly now.

"Mommy, what did the zombies eat!?!?" asked all the kids in unison.

I ignored Scott's piercing gaze and blurted out "They ate.....the people!!!"

"Ewwwwwwwww!!" they all said.

"Yup," I said.  "So you guys really should not complain about lasagna."

They were all quiet for a moment.  But then Ashley turned to me with wide eyes and whispered..."But mommy...what did the squirrels eat?"

Not even phased.


*The same kid who won't eat ketchup.  KETCHUP.  I didn't think it was possible for a kid to not like ketchup until I had the boys.



Funny in My Mind said...

Holy hell, that is funny. FUNNY!

Jen said...

You probably wouldn't be surprised to know that similar conversations happen in my house.

Danae said...

hehe. I have a daughter who won't eat grapes, raspberries and blueberries. Oh, and green bell peppers. Red, orange and yellow are all acceptable, but never green. She's 8.

championm2000 said...

I am now thankful all over again that my two aren't talking yet :-)

MandyE (Twin Trials and Triumphs) said...

Completely sounds like a conversation my girls are starting to have. Too funny!!!

And I marvel, too, at some of the "kid" things my girls won't took me forever to get them to eat mac & cheese, and it's still a hit or a miss. Wha??? They certainly didn't get the memo. ;)

Jen said...

HILARIOUS! :) : ) :)

Katherine said...

That is even better than the starving kids in Africa approach.

And holy crap, seriously? I inspired you to do a monthly menu? I'm flattered. I hope it works out as well for you as it is for us.

Marcia (123 blog) said...

Oh, I believe in no choices. They can starve for one meal and then you'll see how they'll love what you cooked for the next.


Julia said...

How funny! Maybe I'm not that excited for my girls to start talking....

Although...conversations about zombies with toddlers sound pretty hilarious!

wonderchris said...

Melted cheese!?!?! That's a food group!

Brandy@YDK said...

i dont' think i'd do well either - i eat the same stuff over and over.

Holly Ann said...

HAHAHA!!! You had me cracking up with this one! My twins are crazy picky eaters and I'm sure similar conversations would ensue if we tried to change our meal plans. In fact, Ky doesn't like ketchup either.

Noelle {Aloud} said...

For the record, I am also the parent of a ketchup-hater. He obviously did not receive the Kid Memo.