Monday, September 19, 2011

My Mom Went to Baltimore and All I Got Was Crabs

I'm going to Baltimore this weekend for a work conference. Actually, it's more like next week, than next weekend. Details, schmetails.

My kids are excited for me to go so I can buy them presents. Maybe they will miss me.  I'm not sure.

Anyway, last year when I went on this same trip, I bought Ashley a stuffed crab, Owen a telescope, and Aidan one of those bubble globby drippy things. I don't know how else to describe it. Oh,'s a pic:


Anyways, the bubbles were the biggest hit.  So much so that I have been DYING to go back to Baltimore ever since just so I can finally buy Owen and Ashley some dang bubbles.  Seriously, you would have thought I bought Aidan a tap-dancing kitten with polka dots the way that Ashley and Owen overreacted about that thing.  Stuffed crab?  Lame-o.  Telescope?  Whatev.  It was all about the bubbles.  And OMG, did Aidan lord it over them.  I swear, my kids are going to be in therapy until they're 55 dealing with the bubble-purchase fallout.

"Mom said she loved all of us the same...but she only bought Aidan the BUBBLES!!!" 


So, I knew I was going to have to find some bubbles in Baltimore for Owen and Ashley.  But I didn't want to give Aidan the same thing again, mind you.

"Mom said she loved all of us the same...but she bought me the same present TWO YEARS IN A ROW!!!"

So I decided to ask Aidan what he wanted instead.  And he thought about it.  And thought about it.  And then as we were driving home from the pizza place the other night, he said out of the blue: "Mommy, I want a blue crab when you go to that place."

And then my kids subjected me to this conversation.

Me:  You want a blue crab?

Aidan:  Yeah!

Ashley:  Mommy, mommy, I want a crab too!

Me:  What?  I got you a crab last year and you hated it.

Ashley:  Yes, but this year I want a pink crab.

Owen:  I want a GREEN crab!

Me:  What!?  You all have been talking about nothing but bubbles for the past 11 months.

Ashley:  But mommy, now we want crabs.

Aidan:  Yeah, we want crabs!

Owen:  So our crabs can be best friends.

Ashley:  Crabs for all of us!

All:  Crabs!  Crabs!  Crabs!

So I guess that's it.  I'm going to Baltimore and bringing back crabs.  Adding that to the list of things I thought I'd never say before having kids.



mom said...

Buy them crabs AND bubbles. Put the bubbles in their Christmas stockings. You're welcome.

Kmama said...


I think mom has a great idea. Bubbles for Christmas!

Katherine said...


There is no winning in parenthood. One of the many truths no one tells you before you have children.

Jen said...


And maybe you should get some bubbles too b/c you know, they are kids and change their minds all the freaking time.

wonderchris said...

Bringing back crabs from Baltimore! Sooo funny.

Do you think this is Ashley's way of one upping the boys. Mommy got me TWO crabs!

Safe travels!

Rebecca @ Unexplained X2 said...

Have fun in our cloudy little city! I'm sure you'll get your fill of crabs. I kinda want the bubble thing now too!

Holly Ann said...

God, you crack me up every time. That is flippin' hilarious. You can send me the bubbles if you want. ;)

Anonymous said...

"crabs, crabs, crabs!"... That's almost as good as the fork incident!!