Tuesday, May 24, 2011

The Clarifying Rap

Last week I had to drive down to Kansas City for work. I left early that morning so I could arrive in time for a day of looooooooong meetings, and then I drove back again the same night. 

How did I keep myself awake, you ask?

That's easy.  By listening to Top 40 radio.  Well, except for that one little area where I can only get the Spanish-speaking radio station.  Then I do a lot of seated salsa dancing, which is entirely possible if you have enough attitude.

But I digress.

So, anyways, I listened to a lot of Top 40 radio that day.  And I noticed something verrrrry interesting about many of today's songs.  Well, maybe it's not that interesting.  But it certainly seemed fascinating to me after 2 hours in the car and one too many replays of La Bamba.

What I noticed was a little phenomenon I have dubbed "The Clarifying Rap". 

Oh, you know what I'm talking about.  You have your Top 40 singer, singing about love and sex and getting all dirty with the lyrics.  It's sooooo obvious what they're singing about, right?

Well, apparently not to everyone.

Because about half-way through the song, the Top 40 singer backs off and in comes the "Clarifying Rapper" to hit us over the head with what the Top 40 singer was already singing about.

Take, for example, Katy Perry's  E.T.

There is little Katy Perry, singing about vibrating and getting hit with lasers and being infected with loving .... der, pretty obvious what she is talking about.

But then Kanye needs to come in and clarify it for us, just in case.

Tell me what's next, alien sex
I'mma disrobe you, than I'mma probe you
See I abducted you, so I tell ya what to do
I tell ya what to do, what to do, what to do

Um, ew.  Also, I think Kanye might have some control issues, just sayin'.

I was going to give Lil' Wayne's cameo in Mike Posner's "Bow-Chicka-Wow-Wow" as further evidence of the Clarifying Rap, but upon further investigation into the lyrics of that song I realized Wayne (can I just call him Wayne after I've already referred to him once in the same paragraph?) really doesn't add much clarification.  But maybe he just wasn't doing his job properly.  Who knows.

So there you go.  The Clarifying Rap.  You learn something new every day.  Oh, and something else I learned - I will not let my kids listen to Top 40 radio EVER.  Holy cannoli.

P.S.  Can you do me a favor and click on the button below and vote for Twinsomnia at Circle of Moms?  I'm about to fall out of the Top 25.  Boo to the hoo.



Jen said...

I never realized that probably b/c I am in love with the 90's on 9 station on Sirius radio (You know, real music) and you are totally right. .

Funny in My Mind said...

I always change the station when Katy Perry comes on but now that you KNOW the words, I am gonna hafta listen.

Helene said...

Is that what Kanye's saying?? I can't understand the dude half the time.

Back in the day, I used to LOVE that song Little Red Corvette by Prince and I honestly thought it was about a woman who drove a fast car. Uh, no....it wasn't until maybe 1-2 years ago, I finally realized what Prince was REALLY talking about when a couple DJ's were chatting about it on the radio one day.

I just voted for you....I'm so behind you it's not even funny! How do some of those ladies have over 3000 votes?? WTF? Are they campaigning on the local news or something?

Anonymous said...

Those are some weird lyrics!

I dunno why, but as hard as I try, I just don't like Katy Perry. I'm sure she's nice, she's very pretty, her songs are catchy... what is it?? Maybe I'm just jealous.

Danae said...

I had no idea those were the words in the "Clarifying Rap." Good heavens! Good thing we listen to kid's music and books on tape so much...

Brandy@YDK said...

i love top 40 but yes every song is dirty.

Rebecca @ Unexplained X2 said...

If someone said they were going to probe me, I would not be into it...just saying.