In other random news, remember this little tale I told you about Scott and Ashley a few weeks ago? Well, she's been a little focused on death and the afterlife ever since. Also, apparently Scott and the twins watched a documentary on tornadoes the other day.
Which means that - yes, it's time for another edition of:
How Not to Teach Your Kids About
Religion and Weather Phenomena
Starring: My Family
Owen: Mommy, God in da 'ky?
Me: It's sssss-ky. Don't forget to pop your sounds.
Owen: Sssss-ky. Mommy, God in da sssss-ky?
Me: Yup, God is in the sky. He's up in heaven.
Owen: Mommy, God have wings?
Me: Um, I don't think so.
Aidan: Mommy, Jesus have wings?
Ashley: Yes, Jesus has wings!
Owen: No he not!
Me: Yeah, I don't think Jesus has wings.
Aidan: Mommy, when the 'ky dok blue that mean they a tomato?
Me: Ssss-ky. And it's a tornado, not a tomato. Torrrr-naaaa-doooo.
Me: Good job.
Owen: If tomato come, dat mean you dead?
Me: It's a tor-naaaa - oh forget it. Where did you hear that?
Aidan: If a tomato come, dat mean you go to heaven.
Ashley: I wish I was in heaven with God.
Me: Aw. But if you were in heaven, you couldn't play soccer and do crafts and all the fun stuff you do here.
Ashley: I can do that stuff in heaven, too.
Me: Well, yeah, but...
Ashley: And I'll get to play checkers.
Ashley: In heaven, you get to play checkers with Jesus. Daddy said.
I didn't even know where to start. So, I didn't. Although I am gonna keep a close eye on Ashley's tomato intake this summer.