Friday, December 3, 2010

The Return of the Moose

Some long-time readers of my blog may remember a tale I told last Christmas.  A tale of a mysterious, legendary creature that inhabits the homes of little girls and boys during the days of December to observe whether such children are being naughty or nice.  Then, at night, the creature returns to his home at the North Pole to report his findings to the Man in Red. 

The the Christmas Moose. 

And the Man in Red?  Is Santa.  (That part probably went without saying.)

Some children may be visited by someone known as an "Elf on the Shelf" rather than a Christmas Moose.  There's no difference, really, except that children being visited by a Christmas Moose have cheaper parents.

Well, the Christmas Moose has once again arrived at our household to threaten observe the children.  However, things have not necessarily gone as smoothly as we expected.     

There was the first day, where he sat in a slumped position atop our entertainment center.  Ashley seemed suspicious since he did not seem very alert and attentive.  However, I told her the Christmas Moose was just taking a nap.  Crisis averted.

Then there was the next day, when he was still sitting in a slumped position atop our entertainment center.  Now the boys also seemed suspicious.  I explained that maybe the Christmas Moose needed a good night's sleep instead of just a nap.  After all, the North Pole is very far away.

Then there was the day after that.  This day, the kids engaged in behavior that any self-respecting Christmas Moose would deem highly unacceptable.  They were................naughty.  Yes, I said it. 

We warned the children that they had best behave, as the Christmas Moose was watching their every move.  But the Christmas Moose, still slumped, had been rendered impotent by our failure to (i) upright him; and/or (ii) move him somewhere else.  It was if we'd de-antlered the magic right out of him. 

Luckily, Scott took matters into his own hands.  And when the children next checked on the Christmas Moose, they saw that he had disappeared.  Disappeared!  In the middle of the day!

So we explained to them that the Christmas Moose was so aghast at their behavior that he felt the need to report their transgressions to Santa IMMEDIATELY.  As in, he flew back to the North Pole RIGHT THEN AND THERE.  As their eyes widened, we clucked and paced....this was unheard of.  And not a good development at all.  And what's more - maybe he wouldn't come back the next morning.  Maybe Santa would just go ahead and put them on the naughty list.  Permanently

At this point, Ashley was about ready to lose it.  So were the boys, but only because hysteria is catching.  Needless to say, they were delightful for the rest of the day.  And the next morning, the Christmas Moose was back, although this time sitting with perfect posture on top of the kitchen cabinets. 

And the moral of the story is....don't neglect your Christmas Moose.  Or maybe pick a creature that's more intimidating than a stuffed moose.  Hindsight.



Anonymous said...

Oh, I've stooped to the same "lows" to get the kiddos back on the right track! My heart melts when they get so upset, but then I have to keep the poker face going! They can be so naughty sometimes! LOL.

Natalie said...

The "lows" that we do...funny!

Oh and hindsight's always 20/20 they say ;)

Anonymous said...

HAHAHAHAHAHA That's the best story ever!!!

Permanently on the naughty list? Oh, the horror!

The moose is pretty cute, btw

Kate said...

Love this post :) Glad I found you hopping around. Hope you'll come visit!!


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Danae said...

I may need to borrow your Christmas Moose. We had a decidedly very (gasp!) naughty morning. And the regular threat of "Santa's watching" wasn't quite doing it for the kids. We really needed a helper to remind the kids to be good this morning! :o)