Wednesday, December 15, 2010

Important Life Lessons

My dear, hilarious, and incredibly awesome friend Brandi will soon be having her first baby.  And as is tradition when one is about to bring a little one into the world, she recently had a baby shower. 

I was delighted to be invited.  And I wanted to buy her something very special for her shower gift.  Something adorable, soft, and precious.  I didn't know exactly what it would be - but I wanted it to be something squee!-worthy.  You know what I mean.  Something so charming that all the women in attendance at the shower would let out a collective "Squee!" as soon as it emerged from it's tissue-packed gift bag.

Something like this.

Or this.

Or this.

But unfortunately, I waited to buy her gift until the week before the shower.  And even more unfortunately, work got crazy that week.  So crazy that I ended up working late, traveling, and spending much of my free time logged on to my computer billing the hours away.

Pretty soon I realized that things were not looking good.  The shower was only days away, and I still had not bought a gift.  So I did something that, in my opinion, is absolutely essential to learn how to do if you are (i) a wife; (ii) a mother; (iii) employed; or (iv) a combination of any of the foregoing.  And that thing that I learned how to do is:

Adjust Expectations.

Note that I did not say I have to lower my expectations.  I just need to be able to adjust them.  Doesn't that sound much more positive?  I'm all about semantics, people. 

Anyways, I adjusted my expectations as to what sort of gift I was going to be able to bring to the shower.  I knew there was no time left for me to shop.  But I also knew that I'm lucky enough to be married to a stay-at-home-dad who spends half of his waking hours at Target.  So I asked Scott to pick something up off of Brandi's registry.  And the more I thought about it, the more I thought "This is appropriate.  Of course Brandi will want something off her registry for the baby.  That's why she registered.  Duh."  


So, on the day before Brandi's shower, Scott went to Target.  But he couldn't find anything still left on the registry to purchase.  Instead, he improvised and bought baby outfits.  When I got home from work late that night, he filled me in on the change of plans.  So I adjusted my expectations and briefly shuffled through the clothes he'd bought.  They all looked cute, and I thought 'Job well done, Scotty.'

Until I started assembling the gift bag the next morning, just before I was supposed to leave for the shower.  And realized Scott had bought preemie-sized clothes.  And a Christmas outfit.  For a baby that is not expected to be a preemie.  And is not due until February. 

On the drive over to Brandi's, I worked hard to adjust my expectations.  "Oh, this is not so bad," I thought.  "At least he got a gift receipt."  But I was having trouble, I admit it.  What would the guests at the shower think of my sad little present?  There were certainly no squees in my foreseeable future.

So I decided to skip adjusting my expectations, and instead use the second most important thing I have learned how to do over the past few years.

Blame The Husband.

This one works every time.  Especially when he's not there to defend himself.



Rebecca said...

Everyone wants the "squee." I love the idea of "adjusting expectations." Pure genius...just one more way to not consider myself an utter failure!

Kmama said...

LOL at blaming the husband. I've been known to do that myself. It works well. ;-)

wonderchris said...

OMG, that hat!!! :) Very Squee-worthy!

Scott, the effort was admirable!! That's not an easy task.

Gift receipts are lifesavers. ;)

Anonymous said...

You are braver than I. I would never, ever put my husband in charge of something like that!

Funny in My Mind said...

They will totally squee because your hubby picked them up for you. Mine would have thrown a $20 in a plain envelope. Actually, he would have got her an iPod or something like that. Because electronics are the best gifts to give (his words)

BranderPaul said...

I luv ya--the gifts were perfect!!! I'm gonna find the same Christmas outfit in a bigger size--perfect-o!

You're the best friend EVER! :)

Katherine said...

I've used the "Blame the husband" thing a lot. He knows I do. Which makes it worse, I guess.

My fried is having a baby, and I looked at her registry, and it was all white Onesies and socks. Boring. But I didn't dare get them something cuter. Maybe, secretly, they are boring people.