Tuesday, November 30, 2010

I'm ready to tire now. Does this mean I can re-tire soon?

My birthday is in a few weeks.  I'll be turning 35.

{pause for dramatic effect}

That's right.  35.  Mid-thirties.  Half-way to dead. 

Funny how most days I still feel like I'm 16.  A very responsible 16 year old, but still.

In my (almost) 35 years on this planet, I feel like I've accomplished a lot.  Yes, there's a lot of stuff still left to do, but considering that I will become old and decrepit in a few weeks, I'm going to focus on my past accomplishments.  Making a to-do list will just make me more tired, and I need to conserve my energy for the years ahead.

So, without further ado, here is my list of:

11 Things That I Have Accomplished In 35 Years

1.  Graduated from law school.  Which maybe this should be on the list of things I'm not necessarily glad I did.  But who cares - it was hard, so on the list of accomplishments it goes.

2.  Passed the bar exam.  I will never study for anything again.

3.  Married the love of my life (i.e., Scott, just in case you weren't sure).

4.  Kept three children alive since 2005.  I'm not making any promises for the future, but so far so good.

5.  Co-authored a book that was published.  A dang boring book about legal stuff, but I say it counts.

6.  Traveled to some pretty interesting foreign places.  Egypt, Israel, Italy, Greece, Germany, and Tijuana.  Probably had the most fun in TJ.

7.  Took my love and took it down.  Climbed a mountain then I turned around.  And I saw...wait, those are the lyrics to Landslide.

8.  Lived at Mission Beach in San Diego during my junior and senior year of college.  Watched many beautiful ocean sunsets.  And a few sunrises too, wink wink. 

9.  Watched every single episode of Blue's Clues ever made.  This was unintentional, but an accomplishment nonetheless.

10.  Started the Beanie Baby craze of the 90's.  I can't prove this, but I'm telling you, it all started with me and my after-school job at the Village Toymaker in 1993. 

11.  Won "Funniest Blog" in the 2010 Multiple and More Blog Awards.  Except I haven't done that yet.  But you could help me by clicking here, scrolling down and voting for Twinsomnia.  You can vote once per day!

(I'm totally losing right now.  Help an (almost) 35 year old's dream come true, will you?  Do it for the elderly!)


Sunday, November 28, 2010

Two Posts in One Day? What!?

I know, two posts in one day!  It's unheard of for me! 


I just found out my blog was nominated for "Funniest Blog" over at the Multiples and More Second Annual Blog Awards!!!!!


Please vote for me by clicking here - then scroll down until you see the poll for "Funniest Blog" and vote for Twinsomnia.  You can vote for me once each day until December 5th at 9pm EST.

I am SOOOOO excited!!!!!  I was nominated in this category last year and came in last place.  *sniff*   Which I was still insanely excited about, but hoo boy it would be fun to win it all this year!  Help me out by voting, will ya?


Thanksgiving Recap, With a Few Random Digressions

Oof, I am still recovering from Thanksgiving.  In fact, I just finished washing the china tonight.  True story.

Everything turned out delish.  My parents and I split up food-making duties, with my mom and dad handling the turkey and secret family stuffing and mashed potatoes and me handling the sweet potatoes and green bean casserole and pumpkin pie.

Although, technically, my parents did have help from Ashley and Owen on the secret family stuffing.   My family looooooves this stuffing.  And it's a rite of passage for the kids in our family to help make it because it involves a lot of bread squishing and well, kids love to squish.  This is the first year Owen helped.


He looks a mite concerned, doesn't he?  I think he was worried he'd have to taste it.  Which, silly Owen, you don't get to taste the stuffing until it's fully cooked, give or take a couple of hours.  Also, stuffing tasting by children is not allowed unless an adult is willing to share, and well, nobody usually is. 

Aidan didn't participate in the stuffing preparation.  Instead, he laid prostrate on the kitchen floor for some reason that I'm sure seemed really important to a three-year old at the time but that none of us can remember now.  You know, it was probably because I made him drink out of the green cup instead of the blue cup at breakfast.  O, la tragedia!


Random Sidenote:  I know I've spoken of Aidan's hair troubles before on the blog.  But, I don't think I've talked about how Aidan's hair is one of the easiest ways you can tell the twins apart.  See, when Aidan's hair gets too long, the back of it swirls into a cyclone shape, which one of my friends aptly dubbed "The Tornaidan".  You can totally see it in this picture. 


So, if you ever come to visit us, now you know how to tell the twins apart.  [/end random sidenote]

Okay, enough digressing!  In addition to all the food-making, Ashley and I crafted up some Thanksgiving place cards.  When I first asked her if she knew what a place card was, she told me "Sure, mommy.  A pa-lace card is when a police man sends you a card in the mail because it is a nice thing to do."  Which, fair enough.  So then I told her I meant to ask her if she knew what a place card was, and then we were off and running.  


They turned out cute, no?  Ashley wrote everybody's names once I spelled them out for her.  Luckily everyone had short names, because those turkey place cards are not very roomy, are they. 


The table turned out looking pretty nice too.  Again, I failed at taking pictures of the food because I was too busy eating.  But what can you do.  I hope you all had a lovely Thanksgiving too!

P.S.  I got an insane amount of blog hits on Thanksgiving on my Thanksgiving Status Update post.  It was bigger than my SITS day, no joke, people.  Unfortunately, I did not see anyone use any of my incredibly clever and witty status updates on Facebook.  Oh well.  I'll just have to up my game for Christmas.

Thursday, November 25, 2010

Happy Thanksgiving!



Happy Thanksgiving, everyone!  While I'm thankful out the cornucopia for many things this year, I wanted to say a special thank you to all of you who read my blog on a regular basis.  I love to write, and having you all continue to read it, well...it just means a lot.  So thank you.  Thank you for reading.  And I hope you keep coming back for more.


Monday, November 22, 2010

You Can Pick Your Friends, You Can Pick Your Nose, But You Can't Pick Your Friend's Nose. Unless You Use a Booger Ghost.

The twins are learning about super important stuff in preschool this week.  Take today's handout, for example.


As I understand it, you generally cannot pick your nose.  Instead, you must blow your nose into a tissue.  HOWEVER.  If you get a crusty hard green booger in your nose that refuses to be blown outward, you can make a little tissue coat for your finger known as a "Booger Ghost" to remove the offending booger manually.

Good to know.

(I'm hoping the above illustrations are not drawn to scale, because that booger ghost does not look like it would fit comfortably up that kid's nostril.)

Also, Aidan explained, you should never eat your boogers, because that will give you a tummy ache.  Seems like that should've been on the handout too, but whatever.   

I have not asked either Aidan or Owen to demonstrate Booger Ghost usage yet, although it's on my list of things to do.  Although it doesn't really seem seasonally appropriate, you know?  I mean, it's not Halloween anymore.  It's Thanksgiving.


I know what to do.


We'll use a Booger Turkey instead.  It's perfect.

You're welcome for giving you another great holiday idea just in time for Thanksgiving.


Welcome to the Old Apartment

I was 23 years old when Scott and I moved into our first apartment together.  I was in my first year of law school at the time and not working, and Scott had a crap-paying job.  So believe me when I tell you - this place was a dump.

It had a radiator that would take 3 days to turn on.  And then once it was turned on, it would take another 3 days for it to turn off.  And there was only one temperature - hot.  It was a very confusing winter.

There was only one washer and dryer for the building, and you could only get to it by walking down the fire escape and entering the basement through the outside of the building.  This basement was scary.  Like dark, damp, single lightbulb swinging scary.  Like cobwebs, creaky doors, blacked out windows scary.  Like the lambs are screaming Clarice OMG scary.  I wore a lot of dirty clothes my first year of law school.

It had a wall-unit air conditioner that you could not run at the same time as the microwave.  FYI - microwaves are used often when you are in your first year of law school.  If you happened to forget to turn the air conditoner off, you would blow a fuse.  Which you had to change in the basement.  See above. 

If the person who lived in the apartment directly above you decided to take a shower at the same time as you, you would be alternately scalded and frozen with hot and cold water.  So much cursing was done in that shower.  Brings a whole new meaning to the word potty mouth.

And - worst of all - there was no dishwasher.  I know.

Scott and I often reminisce about this first apartment.  Like tonight, when the dishwasher was already full and I refused to hand wash the rest of the dishes due to P.A.S.D.  (Post-Apartment Stress Disorder).  It's a life-time disability, unfortunately.


Friday, November 19, 2010

School Pictures: A Worthwhile Financial Investment. Not.

We got the boys' school pictures back this week.  (Note to Self:  There's a reason why they make you fill out the order form before you see the pictures.  Remember that next year when you're trying to figure out what package to buy.)

Aidan's wasn't too terrible.  He's got hair issues, but that's nothing new


Now my darling Owen, on the other hand.  When he got home from school on picture day and I asked him if he smiled big, he insisted that he in fact did NOT smile big.  And that he was MAD.  But still I thought, "Oh, certainly the photographer got him to crack at least a little smile.  He wouldn't have just snapped a picture of Owen's mad face."


I underestimated my Owen.

At least he looks a little happier in the group pic.  Although I'm not sure what Aidan's pouting about.  Maybe that Owen has two girlfriends while he only has one?


I guess it's true what they say...girls always go for the bad boy. 


Wednesday, November 17, 2010

On Love and Preschool


Ashley has a boyfriend at preschool.  His name is Peyton, and they are going to get married someday.

Although it's not set in stone, because Peyton's love is conditional. I know, I know - it's sad, but true. Apparently, he told Ashley during school the other day, "If you make one more peep, I'm not gonna marry you!" When I asked Ashley what she said back to him, she told me in a hushed tone, "Mommy, I didn't make another sound."

My inner feminist balked.  But then on the other hand, I feel ya, Peyton.  I really do.  She can be a bit chatty.
Even so, I suggested she marry Mason instead.  Despite that unfortunate penguin-mimicking episode during the Thanksgiving pageant, he seems like a nice kid.  But Mason is already marrying another little girl in Ashley's class, so there goes that.  What about Jack, I wondered? 




But it doesn't matter anyway - I can tell that Ashley only has eyes for Peyton.  I mean, come on - she agreed to be quiet for him.  If that isn't the ultimate act of love by a 5 year old, then I don't know what is. 


Monday, November 15, 2010

A Fakesgiving for the Rest of Us

On Sunday evening, my parents, brother, sister-in-law, niece, nephew, grandma, uncle and my own little crew had our annual Fakesgiving celebration. 

What is Fakesgiving, you ask?  Well, I'll tell you.

I described it last year in detail here, but to sum up, Fakesgiving is basically a pre-Thanksgiving celebration for those in my extended family who will not be in town for "real" Thanksgiving.   We do it because we can't stand the thought of celebrating apart from one another, even for one holiday.  Family is really, really important to us.  And oh my gosh, do we love each other.    I just get all sappy thinking about it because...

Okay, fine.  It's actually so we can have two turkey feasts during the month of November.   Don't get me wrong, I love my niece and nephew.  But oh lord, do I love the turkey. 

You know how you get that feeling when you've eaten just enough that you're perfectly, comfortably full?  I went about 1.5 plates beyond that last night.  And since I'm still in a turkey coma tonight, I can't seem to muster up anything else to write about.  So I'm just gonna post some pictures and call it a night.     





Sorry I don't have any pictures of the actual Fakesgiving celebration, but I was too busy eating.  Sometimes you just have to live in the moment, you know?


Saturday, November 13, 2010

Shutterfly Holiday Card Promotion

I was soooooo excited to hear about Shutterfly's holiday cards promotion, because I get my Christmas cards from Shutterfly every year.  And hey, free Christmas cards?  Sign me up!  (Or sign myself up, because that's all I had to do to be part of this promotion.  It was so easy I almost feel guilty about it.)

Anyhoo, I thought I'd take you all on a photo journey showing my relationship with Shutterfly Christmas cards over the years...

First there was 2005, which was Ashley's first Christmas...  She was 4 months old at the time.

Oh, my baby!

Then, there was 2006.  I took about 5,559 pictures that year and only one of them was usable.  She would not.stop.moving.  Even when I tried to tie her to the chair with Christmas lights.

I think this was also back when I used to cut her bangs myself.  No wonder she was always on the run from me.

Then there was 2007.  By this time, the boys had joined our lives and made us a little family of 5.  They were about 10 months old when this picture was taken and Ashley had just turned three.  I smartly did not even attempt to take a group shot of all three of them together.

My photography skills have improved a bit over the years, no?  Although truth be told, we were all looking a little rough back then.  That was a hard year, 3 kids 3 and under.

Then there was 2008.  Or the year of "Owen's Great Santa Hat Protest", as I like to call it.

I kind of felt guilty sending this card out. But I figured nobody would be able to tell whether it was Owen or Aidan crying anyway, so neither of them would get labeled the crabby kid.  Having identical twins comes in really handy sometimes.

Then last year - 2009.  This was the first year I had my DSLR camera, and ooh boy, does it make a difference in my photography skills.  I love this card. 

It's also the first year I upgraded and went with Shutterfly's cardstock cards instead of the regular photo Christmas cards.  I thought it turned out awesome.

Not sure yet what I'm gonna do this year, but I've looked at the new designs Shutterfly has and they are super cute.  I can't wait to pick one out.  Now if only taking the picture to use for it could be so easy...  Well, we can't have everything. ;-)

If you're a blogger and would like to participate in Shutterfly's holiday card promotion too, check it out here.  Thanks Shutterfly! 


Thursday, November 11, 2010

It's On, Fun Thursday.

Since all the kids are in preschool now, they are all busy, busy, busy.  But that all slows down on Thursday, since that's the day all three of them have off during the week.

But Thursday isn't spent leisurely around the house.  No, siree.  Thursday has now been dubbed "Fun Thursday", and is spent by Scott and the kids doing something - you guessed it - fun.  Luckily Scott keeps me updated on their various adventures by messaging me pictures, so I can live vicarously through my cell phone.

However, I have noticed that I have become a bit jealous of Fun Thursdays.  Because dang, they are fun.  And here I am, stuck in my office, with nothing fun to show for it.  And I can prove it too, since I'm a lawyer and have to record my time in order to bill what I do every day of the week.  

There was the first week of Fun Thursday, where Scott took the kids to the zoo. 

From looking back at my time entries, it looks like I spent the day, oh, revising contracts.

Then there was the Fun Thursday where he took them to the Botanical Gardens.

And I revised some more contracts.

Then the next week, they spent Fun Thursday at the Children's Museum

What did I do?  You guessed it - revised more contracts.

Today they are going to a movie.  And I'll tell you what I'm doing.  And it's not revising more contracts. 

I'm writing a memo.  Whoo hoo!  Take that, Fun Thursday. 

Well, at least I tried.


Monday, November 8, 2010

Thanksgiving Status Update

I am not one to obsess over the blog stats, because anything with the word "statistics" in it sounds hard.  Like it involves a lot of thinking.  And frankly, I do enough thinking at work so there's not much to be left when it comes to my blogging.  Had you noticed?

That being said, I noted an interesting trend in my statistics during the month of October.  One of my posts from last year - "Halloween Status Update" - got hits up the wazoo.  Now, not only is that post from last year - it's also nothing to get excited about.  Granted, I discussed a very important medical condition known as "eyeball-a-phobia", while also ruminating on the social risks of passing out coconut candy at your child's Halloween preschool parade.  But still, there's nothing earth shattering or life changing in that post. 

So why is it so popular, I wondered.

And then it hit me.  It's because of the title.  Apparently there were tons of people out there in the month of October searching for funny or witty or interesting Halloween status updates to put on their facebook or twitter pages.  And instead they just got a case study about eyeball-a-phobia.  Which, albeit fascinating, was not what the people wanted, apparently.

Well, I am a woman of the people, people.  And I give the people what they want.  Once I figure it out thirteen months later.

So, without further ado, I've posted below a list of suggested funny, witty, and/or interesting Thanksgiving Status Updates that you all may pilfer for your facebook or twitter pages throughout the month of November. 


  • Gobble, gobble!
  • Turkey smells great! 
  • I'm so thankful for [insert something to be thankful for here].  Happy Thanksgiving everyone!
  • Oh, the Macy's Day Parade was so awesome this year!  That darn Snoopy balloon!
  • Has anyone ever heard of a "Turducken?"  It's a chicken stuffed in a duck stuffed in a turkey OMG!
  • Oh my God, so full! 

I know, I know.  You're all shocked that I'm just giving away these fabulous Thanksgiving status updates free of charge.  But we all need to give back once in awhile.  You know what they say..."'Tis the season!"  (Wait - I need to save that one for December).


Sunday, November 7, 2010

7 Things I Do Not Understand About Football

Why the TV Commentators Get So Dressed Up

Now this I really do not understand.  When I think of football fashion, I think sweat pants, oversized jersey, beer, and couch.   I do not think fancy Italian suit and silk tie.  For pete's sake, I'm a lawyer and I don't even wear a suit to work.  Why do those poor guys need to get so dressed up?  They just look so uncomfy.     

Why My Husband Gets Upset When His Team Wins

Me:  Hey honey, we won!

Him:  Yeah, but we almost lost.

Me:  So what!  We won!  Hooray!

Him:  Yeah, but we almost lost.

Me:  But we won.

Him:  But we almost lost.


Me:  Hey, can we turn it to Oprah?

Why It Takes So Long

So.  One game.  4 quarters. 15 minutes each.  That should be 60 minutes tops, people.  So why does it take 3 hours????  I don't get it. 

Why the Referees Wear Baseball Hats

It just seems unsafe.  Get those guys some helmets.

Why the Hate for the Ponytail Holder

I just wince every time I see these football players with the long hair flowing about their shoulders and down their backs.  Ouch!  Won't it get snagged by their helmet?  Won't it get pulled when they're tackled?  Won't it get twisted in their shoulder pads?  Oh, the split ends!  Put it in a ponytail, guys.  Your hair will thank me later.

Why Everyone Knows Where the Ball is But Me

Without fail, they snap it or hand it off or option it or whatever it's called and I am like "Ooh, that guy's got it and he's gonna go ALL.THE.WAY!  Wait, why is the camera going off screen when that guy is gonna go ALL.THE.WAY!  Oh, because he never had it to begin with. That other guy over there did."  They get me every time.

Why My Husband Prefers to Watch Football Without Me

Well, I think I'm delightful.  But to each their own.


Wednesday, November 3, 2010

Little Things That Make Me Stupid Excited: November Edition

Hey everybody, it's time to get stupid excited again! 

For those of you new to my blog, "Little Things That Make Me Stupid Excited" is a feature I (usually) post on the first day of each month.   It's like Oprah's Favorite things - if Oprah was really cheap. And loved to shop at Kohl's.  Now, let me make clear that I am not hawking or reviewing products here.  Nobody's paying me or providing me with anything. LTTMMSE is just a little outlet for me to exclaim over and dissect little materialistic things that make me ridiculously excited.  Sidenote:  It doesn't take much, people.    

Grab the button below and link on up in the comments if you want to make your own list! I'd love to read what makes you STUPID excited too!!  And if you'd like to see my past lists, they're all linked up here.

Little Things That Make Me Stupid Excited


I've got eight stupid fabulous things for the month of November!  Are you ready?  Then let's begin!


Death Star Pumpkin

It is too late to carve this pumpkin this year...but it is SO ON for next Halloween.  That is, if I can convince Scott to do it.  My pumpkin carving skills are much less stellar than his.

Seriously though, isn't that the coolest?!?  [/end Star Wars Geek Alert]

Prosciutto and Chicken Penne Pasta

I found the recipe for this dish in last month's Hy-Vee Seasons magazine, and  I've made it twice since then.  It is delish.  Not for the faint of heart, though - bring on the heavy cream!

Prosciutto and Chicken Penne Pasta
All you need:

2 tbsp olive oil
2 boneless, skinless chicken breasts
3 c. whole-wheat penne pasta
1 tbsp butter
2 cloves garlic, minced
1 shallot, minced
1 (3 oz) package prosciutto, chopped
1 1/2 c. heavy whipping cream
1/4 c. dry white wine
1/2 tsp cayenne pepper
1/2 tsp white pepper
3/4 c. grated Asiago cheese
1 c. chopped Roma tomatoes
1/4 c. chopped fresh basil

All you do:

In a medium sauté pan. heat olive oil and sear chicken breasts on both sides; reduce heat, cover and cook until juices run clear. Remove chicken to a cutting board to cool. Slice into strips; set aside.

Meanwhile, bring a large pot of lightly salted water to a boil. Add pasta and cook for 8 to 10 minutes or until al dente; drain and set aside. (Pasta should be timed to be done just as the sauce is finished.)

While the pasta is cooking, heat butter in a large sauté pan and sauté garlic, shallots and prosciutto until shallots are transparent. Add cream, white wine, cayenne pepper and white pepper. Bring to a simmer and cook, stirring almost constantly, for about 5 minutes. Stir in cheese and cook for another 2 to 3 minutes.

Add pasta, sliced chicken breast, tomato and basil into cream sauce and toss.


"If It's Love", by Train

I loooooove this song.  Every time it comes on the radio I get all happy and sing along.  Which I apologize for in case you're driving next to me when my windows are down.  Any song that can reference both Winger and My Fair Lady is all good in my book.


Our New Media Center

Um, yeah.  This is what I'm the most excited about - our new media center.  That my husband BUILT from scratch, after I told him I liked this version in the Pottery Barn catalog.   So he just whipped one up for us.  Oh, and he only spent about $500 making it versus the $3,000 Pottery Barn wanted.  Bazinga!  He shall henceforth be known as "Scottery Barn."   


"Blackout Cake" from Lo Sole Mio

I'm sorry to put this one on the list for those of you who aren't local, but if you ARE from Omaha then I'm sure you've heard of this insanely good Italian restaurant on 32nd Ave.  But what you may not have heard about is the insanely good Blackout Cake on the dessert menu.  OH.MY.GOD. This dessert is beyond delicious. It's chocolate cake filled with hot melted chocolate that oozes out and good lord do I love it.  I found the above pic from some random site on the internet since I couldn't find a picture on Lo Sole Mio's website, which frankly, is unbelievable to me. If I were doing marketing for Lo Sole Mio I would just put a big picture of this cake on the building with a big arrow pointing to it.  YUM.


 I just bought this coat from Old Navy for the winter ahead and I LOVE it.  Isn't it cute??  And it was only $60!  Now that is a steal for a cute winter coat, I am telling you.


I have this friend Molly, who keeps a lovely home.  And one of my favorite things about her home is that she always has happy Bath and Body Works handsoap in her guest bathrooms.  I once asked her how she was so organized to get to Bath and Body Works so frequently to replace her handsoaps, and she informed me that she buys it in bulk at the "Buy Ten Bajillion Bath and Body Works Items for $20 Sale" or whatever you call it.  Seriously, duh.  Anyway, a few months ago, Molly generously offered to pick up some soap for me at the next sale since she knows I am nowhere near organized enough to handle that much planning on my own.  And true to form, Miss Molly showed up with a big bag of soap for me at our Halloween shindig on Sunday.  Now I can impress my houseguests too!  Thanks Moll!

Hair Tricks by Heather from The Spohrs Are Multiplying

I've been having loads of fun with mine and Ashley's hair lately, due in large part to this lovely lady's hair tutorials.  Simple things like fish tails and bang braids that have always stumped me are now possible due to her hair video tutorials!  I get so excited when there's a new one up. I feel so fashionable and sassy when my hair is all did.

And that's all for this month!  Hope you enjoyed it!


Monday, November 1, 2010

Trick or Spontaneously Combust

I know, I know.  I'm supposed to post LTTMMSE on the first of the month. 

But yesterday was HALLOWEEN!  And I dressed all the kids up as characters from TOY STORY!


And Scott carved this really cool PUMPKIN!


And I dressed up as a WITCH!


And it was all just so EXCITING I couldn't wait a day to post about it! 

If my kids were in charge, "Halloween" would be renamed to "OMG HALLOWEEN!!!"   I think they almost exploded last night from all the excitement, sugar, and layers of clothing stuffed underneath their costumes.  The shouting, the screams, the running - I'm making it sound like a bad horror movie, but I promise you they were having the time of their little lives.

But it's all over now, and it's time to move on to Thanksgiving.  Which is a holiday I feel really bad for, what with its sensible pilgrims and cornucopias of fruits and veggies.  Halloween is a tough act to follow.