Thursday, December 30, 2010

Let's Reflect, Shall We?

As the end of the year approaches, I thought it would be nice to take a quiet moment to reflect on the past 12 months. You know - sum up what I've learned, what I need to work on, how my children have grown and inspired me...

But that sounded like way too much work.

So instead, I'm just going to reflect on my favorite posts over 2010. It's been quite a crazy year at Twinsomnia, if I do say so myself!

January:  Ashley and I had a deep conversation while finger painting.  She really makes me think, you know?  Also, I posted pictures of the boys wearing fake moustaches when they were babies.  Babies wearing fake moustaches!!!!!!  How can you not click on that?!?!

February:  In February, I got a really bad haircut.  And thus learned the importance of bringing a picture to show your stylist instead of trying to describe the haircut you want.  I also showed the kids Star Wars for the very first time.  Hey, did you know that there are robots in it?

March:  I realized the importance of supervising your child's craft projects - especially when they expect you to hang them on the fridge when they're done.  I was also horrified by an episode of Little Bear.  The things they show on children's tv!!!

April:  I was almost killed by a barbecue.  Carpe diem, my friends - you never know when it's all gonna end.

May:  I explained why Scott's the one who handles car issues in our household.  But I don't care what you say, that thing looked like a helicopter. 

June:  A gorilla fell in love with me.  Yup.  I've still got it.  Also, I realized that Owen is an evil genius

July:  July was a big month for me - it was the start of both Little Things That Make Me Stupid Excited and Date Night Challenge.  And yeah - I know I've gotta get back on that date night challenge thing. 

August:  Speaking of Date Night Challenge, my favorite one we did was Breakfast in Bed, which included a video reenactment by Scott and I of key scenes from  the 80's classic - The Breakfast Club.  If you didn't check it out then, you really should now.  There may be dancing.  And lots of emoting.  I think I missed my calling as an actress.

September:  In September, the kids went back to school.   And Ashley made a really great impression on her teacher with her riddle-solving skills

October:  I attempted to make a wreath out of candy corn and almost burned off all of my fingerprints in the process.

November:  I lamented my lack of understanding of the sport of football.  Still don't get it.  Also, I invented the Booger Turkey.

December:  Scott came up with a fantastic idea for a book.  Maybe we'll see it published in 2011.  ;-)

Hope you've all enjoyed the ride this year!  I know I have. Thanks for reading, everybody!


Tuesday, December 28, 2010

Mommy in a Coma, I know, I know, it's serious.

Seriously, I have been humming my version of this song ever since Christmas, because I cannot wake up from my holiday coma.

All I want to do is sleeeeeeeeeeeeeeep.  And then wake up and eat leftover Christmas cookies.  And then sleeeeeeeeeeep some more.

I think I've burned through all my mommy reserves.  I had a 4-day weekend and spent the entire time present shopping or wrapping presents or supervising the unwrapping of presents or present assembling or enforcing present sharing.  And don't get me started on the present playing.  I got home from work yesterday evening expecting to park myself on the couch and instead got sucked into an hour-long bout of Sorry!, the game of sweet revenge.  I was on Aidan and Owen's team.  I will spare you the play-by-play, but let 's just say that "sweet revenge" is a concept best not served to three year olds.

I would love to provide a recap of our Christmas celebration with pictures, but frankly, I don't think I took any.  Just imagine a weekend filled with a flurry of wrapping paper and you pretty much got it.

Anyways, I'm trying to hop back on my blogging saddle, which is difficult when you are still comatose.  But here I am, hopping away.  Hope you all had a wonderful Christmas!  And thank you for all of the birthday wishes!


Sunday, December 19, 2010

Birthday Wishes

On my 35th birthday...


I only had one wish.


That the next 5 years of my thirties...


Are as incredible as the first.

Happy Birthday to me.

Thursday, December 16, 2010

Back in My Day, We Called it Rapunzel

Last weekend, Scott and I took the kids to see Tangled.

I looked up movie times online and selected the 12:05 showing.  We stuffed the kids in their winter coats, piled into Scott's truck and headed out to the theater down the road.  Then I realized I forgot to feed them lunch.  But no matter!  I had a pack of twizzlers and gummy worms stuffed in my purse.  That would tie them over.

We parked and herded them into the movie theater lobby.  Nobody else was around, so it must have been a slow day for movies.  Scott walked up to the ticket counter and requested two adult and three childrens' tickets for Tangled.

The ticket lady replied, "Sure, two adults and one child for Tangled."

And Scott said, "No, two adults and three children."  He is so honest, isn't he?  I do not know if I am as morally upstanding as he is, although I suppose it's more difficult to sneak two puffy-coated children past the ticket taker than a pack of twizzlers.

Then the ticket lady said, "Oh, are any of them two or under?"

And Scott said, "No."  Dang, he is really honest!  I really married a stand-up a guy. 

And then the ticket lady said, "That will be $47.00."  And I might have shrieked "WHAT!?!?!?"  Forty-seven dollars!!  For a movie!?!  For a kid movie that I didn't even want to see and that (god love my kids) they wouldn't even appreciate anyway!?!?

I almost passed out.  Apparently I hadn't noticed that the 12:05 showing was for the 3D version of Tangled.  And 3D movies cost extra.  A lot extra, particularly if you're buying tickets for a family of five. 

I looked to see when the next showing of non-3D Tangled was scheduled.  It wasn't until 1:00.  Now, some people might try to explain to their three non-lunch-fed aged five and under children that they need to wait for an hour before they can see the movie that their mom got them super-hyped up to see on the drive over.   Those people are crazy.  So we forked over the $47.00 and got our tickets and our fancy 3D glasses.

(I saw the recycle bin for the 3D glasses as we walked into our theater and I actually said "HA!" out loud.  We were soooooo keeping our glasses.) 

Anyway, the movie was cute.  I did have an awkward moment when Ashley whispered to me that Rapunzel was not being a good girl because she didn't listen to her mommy.  I tried to quietly explain that the "mommy" was a bad guy and you don't have to listen if your mommy is a bad guy, and well...let's just say that now she might try sneaking out of the house a lot earlier than one would normally anticipate.  Dang Disney.

But the 3D was cool.  In fact, there was this one scene with lanterns where I said "Ooh, Aidan put your glasses back on so you can see this!"  Yeah.  So when is this 3D craze going to be over again?  I have enough to think about without having to check both the time and the viewing format of my movies.  But the good news is, when it's time for the next movie my kids probably won't say "OH, can we see it in 3D, mommy pleeeeease!?!?", because they think 3D movies are just super fuzzy movies. 

Super fuzzy expensive movies.  Grumble.


Wednesday, December 15, 2010

Important Life Lessons

My dear, hilarious, and incredibly awesome friend Brandi will soon be having her first baby.  And as is tradition when one is about to bring a little one into the world, she recently had a baby shower. 

I was delighted to be invited.  And I wanted to buy her something very special for her shower gift.  Something adorable, soft, and precious.  I didn't know exactly what it would be - but I wanted it to be something squee!-worthy.  You know what I mean.  Something so charming that all the women in attendance at the shower would let out a collective "Squee!" as soon as it emerged from it's tissue-packed gift bag.

Something like this.

Or this.

Or this.

But unfortunately, I waited to buy her gift until the week before the shower.  And even more unfortunately, work got crazy that week.  So crazy that I ended up working late, traveling, and spending much of my free time logged on to my computer billing the hours away.

Pretty soon I realized that things were not looking good.  The shower was only days away, and I still had not bought a gift.  So I did something that, in my opinion, is absolutely essential to learn how to do if you are (i) a wife; (ii) a mother; (iii) employed; or (iv) a combination of any of the foregoing.  And that thing that I learned how to do is:

Adjust Expectations.

Note that I did not say I have to lower my expectations.  I just need to be able to adjust them.  Doesn't that sound much more positive?  I'm all about semantics, people. 

Anyways, I adjusted my expectations as to what sort of gift I was going to be able to bring to the shower.  I knew there was no time left for me to shop.  But I also knew that I'm lucky enough to be married to a stay-at-home-dad who spends half of his waking hours at Target.  So I asked Scott to pick something up off of Brandi's registry.  And the more I thought about it, the more I thought "This is appropriate.  Of course Brandi will want something off her registry for the baby.  That's why she registered.  Duh."  


So, on the day before Brandi's shower, Scott went to Target.  But he couldn't find anything still left on the registry to purchase.  Instead, he improvised and bought baby outfits.  When I got home from work late that night, he filled me in on the change of plans.  So I adjusted my expectations and briefly shuffled through the clothes he'd bought.  They all looked cute, and I thought 'Job well done, Scotty.'

Until I started assembling the gift bag the next morning, just before I was supposed to leave for the shower.  And realized Scott had bought preemie-sized clothes.  And a Christmas outfit.  For a baby that is not expected to be a preemie.  And is not due until February. 

On the drive over to Brandi's, I worked hard to adjust my expectations.  "Oh, this is not so bad," I thought.  "At least he got a gift receipt."  But I was having trouble, I admit it.  What would the guests at the shower think of my sad little present?  There were certainly no squees in my foreseeable future.

So I decided to skip adjusting my expectations, and instead use the second most important thing I have learned how to do over the past few years.

Blame The Husband.

This one works every time.  Especially when he's not there to defend himself.


Monday, December 13, 2010

Christmas Status Update

Judging by the amount of hits I had on my Thanksgiving Status Update post last month, there were tons of people out there looking for help in writing funny, witty and interesting Thanksgiving status updates to impress their facebook friends. 

Well, never fear, google searchers.  Because I am back this month to assist you with even funnier, even wittier, and even more interesting status updates for you to use during the Christmas season!  Feel free to take these status updates and use them on your own facebook pages!  I promise you, your facebook friends will idolize you!   Your ex-boyfriend and/or girlfriend will wonder why they ever broke up with you!  Your relatives will start to love you again!  Those popular kids from high school will want to build a time machine so they can travel back to sophomore year and invite you to sit at their lunch table! 

Again, I know that it is surprising that I would just gift you all with these free status updates for the taking.  But that is the true meaning of Christmas, is it not?  Tis better to give than to receive.  (Although that extra $0.08 I'll make on adsense from the increased traffic is awfully enticing, I must admit.)

Well, without further ado, here they are - Christmas status updates that will keep your facebook friends coming back for more.


  • Just finished baking and decorating the sugar cookies.  Now it's time to trim the tree and then its off to sing Christmas carols with my darling [two][three] children and my incredibly good-looking [husband][wife]!  My life is perfect!  And so much better than yours, no offense!

  • Post this as your facebook status if you're proud to celebrate the TRUE meaning of Christmas - Jesus dying to save us from our sins!   Thanks Jesus!

  • Overheard in the MangerMary:  Joseph, I just had a freaking baby.  No, three foreign men cannot come into the barn, I don't care what they're bringing.  Joseph:  But Mary, they've got gold!  Gold, I tell you!  Don't you know how much swaddling clothes cost these days!?  And don't get me started on how bad we need a new donkey.

  • I saw mommy kissing Santa Claus.  Whore!

  • In the immortal words of Mariah Carey, all I want for Christmas is you.  Also, I can hardly wait for another taste of your honey.

  • Got everything I wanted for Christmas this year.  Beautiful family, friends, food on the table and a roof over our heads.  Oh, and an iPad.  SUCK IT, LOSERS!

  • Little [insert your child's name] just asked me if Santa Claus wasn't real.  :-(  I said, 'Well, no he's not.  And thanks for ruining Christmas.'  Kids are so selfish.

  • Deck the halls with bows of Holly!  Who the hell is Holly anyway?  And why is she always bowing?

  • 'Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the house, not a creature was stirring, except for my gastrointestinal tract...  Too much cheese...oof.

  • On the twelfth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me....[insert something totally crappy].  Gee, thanks honey.

  • On the twelfth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me....[insert something totally awesome].  Gee, thanks honey!

And my absolute favorite...

  • [Insert absolutely anything.  Follow it with:]  'Tis the season!

Works every time.

And, I could go on and on.  It's a wonder that I don't have ten million facebook friends, with all these witty facebook status updates pouring out of my brain, right?  Right?


Friday, December 10, 2010

Kids Are Gross

At 5:00 this morning, I was awakened by a warm sensation spreading throughout the lower half of my body.

It was pleasant at first, until I realized I was being peed upon.

(One of the things I never knew before becoming a parent is just how many ways there are to wake a person up via bodily fluid.  The possibilities are endless.  Just ask my kids.)

Anyway, I got up, removed the offending child from the bed, and warned Scott not to roll over.  Then I got myself and said child cleaned up, put said child back in his/her own bed, and then woke Scott up again so we could change our sheets.

We were both in a griping state of tiredness as we stripped the bed.  "These kids need to learn to stay in their own beds," I may have muttered.  "This is ridiculous," Scott may have answered back.

Pretty soon we were tucked back in, but the conversation continued.

"We gotta buy that one book.  That book about teaching your kids to stay in bed," Scott said.

"Yeah, we do.  What was it called again?" I asked.

"I can't remember," said Scott.

"Me either," I said.

"I think it was something like 'If You're Gonna Wet the Bed, Wet Your Own F*ckin' Bed'", said Scott.

And then I caught a serious case of the giggles.

I did some research on Amazon this morning.  Apparently, it's actually called The Sleep Fairy.  However, I like Scott's title much better, don't you? 

Thursday, December 9, 2010

Bullety Goodness

Sorry guys, I'm bringing out the bullets today.  But everybody loves a little bullety goodness every now and then, don't they?

  • The marshmallow wreath lives!  There is no discernable meltage yet.  However, it will be 50 degrees tomorrow so it's gonna be a tough day for her.  Cross your fingers that she pulls through.

  • It's T-minus 9 days until I turn into an old lady.  In fact, I can barely type this sentence - the arthritis is making my bones cramp up.  But you know what?  Enough is enough.  I have decided that I am going to celebrate the hell out of this birthday.  And by doing so, maybe I will trick myself into believing that turning 35 is awesome.  Now I just have to convince my husband and kids to spend an entire day celebrating me and my awesomeness.  That shouldn't be hard, right?  *chirp chirp*

  • The other night Owen announced that he didn't want to go to bed and that he was MAD! and that I wasn't his best friend anymore.  So I told him that I was MAD! too and he wasn't my best friend anymore either.  And he said FINE!  So I said FINE!  And then I threw in another I MAD!  So he did too. And then he said DON'T TALK TO ME!  So I said YOU DON'T TALK TO ME, HMPH! And we went back and forth for a bit until he finally cracked up laughing.  And then he went to bed happy.  So far, I've always been able to break him.  You know, it's lucky my kids find me funny, otherwise we might be in for some serious therapy bills down the road.

  • Kim at Better Than We Could Pray For just had me in all smiles the other day after posting a video of her adorable baby girl hooting at the owls on my blog.  LOVE IT.  Hoot hoot, right back atcha, Sam!  :-)

  • I really feel like I should come up with one more bullet.  But the tank is empty, my friends, so it's off to bed for me.  Hope you all have a lovely Friday!


Tuesday, December 7, 2010

World TTTS Awareness Day

Today I'm going to be a little more serious than normal on my blog, since it's World TTTS Awareness Day.  For those of you who don't know (which included me before I was diagnosed with it), TTTS stands for "Twin to Twin Transfusion Syndrome."  It's a rare condition that can develop during an identical twin pregancy if the two babies share a single placenta.  And it's serious, scary, and potentially deadly stuff.  You can learn more about it here.

But let me back up a bit.

I remember when Scott and I first found out we were having twins. 

I was almost 12 weeks along.  Almost out of the first trimester.  We had just flown back home from a week long trip to San Diego for a college friend's wedding.  It was late at night and I was exhausted as we drove home from the airport.  Ashley was asleep in her carseat in the backseat.  I was thinking about how her first birthday was only a few days away. 

That's when the bleeding started.   

I was convinced I was miscarrying.  I'd had a miscarriage before, a very early one, but I knew the drill.  There was nothing I could do to stop this.  I was wrecked.  I called the doctor the next morning, and they told me what I already knew.  I was scheduled for an ultrasound the next day.

Scott and I went in together.  By this time, the bleeding had stopped.  And being a mother, of course I hoped.  Hoped that we'd see a flickering heart on the screen.  But I knew what I had seen and felt that night in the car and the hours that ticked by so slowly afterwards.  So I held Scott's hand tightly when the ultrasound began.

I cannot describe that moment with any justice.  But imagine going into a room, prepared to hear that your deeply desired baby no longer lives inside you.  And then to see on the screen that not only does that baby's heart beat, but another one beside it beats as well.  Scott and I both knew the minute we saw the screen.  And the joy on Scott's face as our eyes met...well, I will never forget it as long as I live.

That is the story of how we found out we were having twins.

There is also a story of how we almost lost those twins.  That story is filled with doctor visits.  More ultrasounds than I can count.  A needle removing liters of amniotic fluid from my swollen belly.  Driving six hours to Cincinnati in the middle of the night to meet with a team of world-renowned maternal-fetal specialists.  MRIs.  Echocardiograms.  Fetal-laser surgery.  15 weeks of bed rest.  A 58% chance of both of the boys surviving. 

A coin toss for my babies' lives.

TTTS is horrible.  I was blessed with two lives growing inside of me, completely unexpectedly, and then just as I began to feel and accept the miracle of it all, TTTS threatened to take it all away. 

I was one of the lucky ones.  But I know how easily I could have fallen on the other side of that coin toss.  If you or anyone you know becomes pregant with identical twins, make sure they know about TTTS so they can watch for the signs.  And make sure they know about the TTTS Foundation, because it is an extremely helpful resource during an identical twin pregnancy.

I had never heard of TTTS before I was diagnosed with it, but I was extremely fortunate that my doctor had.  Because if it weren't for him, I wouldn't have these guys.


But more importantly, they wouldn't have each other.  And that's what I am the most grateful for.

That my boys have each other.


Sunday, December 5, 2010

Have Yourself A Puffy Little Christmas

So, I did it.  I made the marshmallow wreath.  Isn't it cute????????  And puffy?????  I just want to give it a big hug.

And it was so easy!  All I had to do was stick a million marshmallows onto a white wreath form with toothpicks.  Then I added a few gumdrops and bing bang I was done.

This project (a) did not involve a glue gun; (b) did not require any plain paint; and (c) involved a less appealing food item than candy corn, so I did not gain ten pounds while making it.  So, as you can see, I have learned from my past crafting mistakes.

However, there were a couple of other crafting tips that I picked up along the way that I thought I'd share with you all here.

1.  When inserting the marshmallows, it is important to note that you should not put the toothpick into the marshmallow first, and then press down on the marshmallow with your thumb to plunge it into the wreath form.  Because the toothpick will then stab you in the thumb.  I know - totally unforseen consequence.

2.  You may want to use some glue.  I went the toothpick purist route, and well, we have had some gumdrop plopping incidents.  Nothing is worse than sitting proudly in your family room having hung up your beautifully crafted marshmallow wreath, talking to your husband about how you are a crafting genius, and then hearing a plop...plop...roll....coming from the entryway.   And then another one.  And then another one after that, too.

3.  Use pretty ribbon to hang it up.  This is not a new tip, as we learned this during my last crafting foray with the lynched Halloween wreath.  However, I now know that it is important to measure the pretty ribbon before you cut it.  Because if you don't, you may cut it too short and then have to tie the pretty ribbon back together again so the wreath will hang where you want it to on the door. 

4.  Marshmallows are dusty.  And wreath forms shed a lot of flaky stuff, especially when you are jamming toothpicks into them.  Therefore, do not make this project while sitting on the couch in front of the TV.  Unless you just bought Eclipse on DVD.  Then it's okay.

5.   If you're planning to hang your wreath on your front door, and you have a glass storm door in front of it, you may want to check that your wreath's poof level will enable you to fully shut both doors.  I just barely made it, phew.

6.  Speaking of storm doors, Scott informs me that night-time condensation combined with the amplified heat from the sun shining directly on the glass storm door will likely melt and destroy my marshmallow wreath by high noon tomorrow.  However, I'm feeling positive about things.  He has indicated that the loser has to clean it up, so let's hope I'm right.



There's only an hour left to vote for Twinsomnia as funniest blog over at Multiples and More! And I'm losing!  Ack!  I'm trying desperately to think of something funny to write about to convince you to go over and make me a winner, but all I can come up with is Aidan's favorite knock-knock joke.

Aidan:  Knock knock!

Me:  Who's there?

Aidan:  Why the chicken cross the road?

Me:  Why?

Aidan:  To get the otha side!!!!!!!

It doesn't even make sense!!!  But it's all I got.  So please, go vote!  Don't forget to scroll alllllllllllllll the way down to the bottom of the post and click in the little circle next to Twinsomnia and then press the vote button.


Friday, December 3, 2010

The Return of the Moose

Some long-time readers of my blog may remember a tale I told last Christmas.  A tale of a mysterious, legendary creature that inhabits the homes of little girls and boys during the days of December to observe whether such children are being naughty or nice.  Then, at night, the creature returns to his home at the North Pole to report his findings to the Man in Red. 

The the Christmas Moose. 

And the Man in Red?  Is Santa.  (That part probably went without saying.)

Some children may be visited by someone known as an "Elf on the Shelf" rather than a Christmas Moose.  There's no difference, really, except that children being visited by a Christmas Moose have cheaper parents.

Well, the Christmas Moose has once again arrived at our household to threaten observe the children.  However, things have not necessarily gone as smoothly as we expected.     

There was the first day, where he sat in a slumped position atop our entertainment center.  Ashley seemed suspicious since he did not seem very alert and attentive.  However, I told her the Christmas Moose was just taking a nap.  Crisis averted.

Then there was the next day, when he was still sitting in a slumped position atop our entertainment center.  Now the boys also seemed suspicious.  I explained that maybe the Christmas Moose needed a good night's sleep instead of just a nap.  After all, the North Pole is very far away.

Then there was the day after that.  This day, the kids engaged in behavior that any self-respecting Christmas Moose would deem highly unacceptable.  They were................naughty.  Yes, I said it. 

We warned the children that they had best behave, as the Christmas Moose was watching their every move.  But the Christmas Moose, still slumped, had been rendered impotent by our failure to (i) upright him; and/or (ii) move him somewhere else.  It was if we'd de-antlered the magic right out of him. 

Luckily, Scott took matters into his own hands.  And when the children next checked on the Christmas Moose, they saw that he had disappeared.  Disappeared!  In the middle of the day!

So we explained to them that the Christmas Moose was so aghast at their behavior that he felt the need to report their transgressions to Santa IMMEDIATELY.  As in, he flew back to the North Pole RIGHT THEN AND THERE.  As their eyes widened, we clucked and paced....this was unheard of.  And not a good development at all.  And what's more - maybe he wouldn't come back the next morning.  Maybe Santa would just go ahead and put them on the naughty list.  Permanently

At this point, Ashley was about ready to lose it.  So were the boys, but only because hysteria is catching.  Needless to say, they were delightful for the rest of the day.  And the next morning, the Christmas Moose was back, although this time sitting with perfect posture on top of the kitchen cabinets. 

And the moral of the story is....don't neglect your Christmas Moose.  Or maybe pick a creature that's more intimidating than a stuffed moose.  Hindsight.


Thursday, December 2, 2010

Bowling and Voting: Two National Pastimes

Scott took the kids bowling today.  You know, for Fun Thursday.

(See all the videos at the bottom of the post.  For some reason they're not showing up in my google reader.  I would figure out why but that would be technologically challenging).

I love how Ashley just attacks the lane.  Go for it, girl!  You throw that ball!  Aidan is much more cautious and deliberate. But his celebration at the end is awesome.  And Owen is just like me.  Throw the ball, and then don't.move.a.muscle until it hits the pins just in case you shift gravity and veer the ball off course.  Smart thinking, son.

Anyway, I wish I was there. Boo Fun Thursdays and the jealousy you cause me! I will now go back to my billing station.

But not before reminding you all to vote, vote, vote for Twinsomnia as funniest blog over at Multiples and More! However, I have been informed that my voting instructions may have been inadequate. Once you go over to the Multiples and More website, you need to scroll alllllllllllllll the way down to the bottom of the post and click in the little circle next to Twinsomnia and then press the vote button. Apparently some people thought they were just supposed to click on the link to my blog under the list of nominations, which doesn't do anything but take you right back here. Which, hello! Nice to have you back!

I wonder how many votes I have missed due to this misunderstanding! I demand a recount! It's like the hanging chad incident of the blog world! Oh well, what can you do.


Wednesday, December 1, 2010

Little Things That Make Me Stupid Excited: December Edition

Hey everybody, it's time to get stupid excited again! 

For those of you new to my blog, "Little Things That Make Me Stupid Excited" is a feature I (usually) post on the first day of each month.   It's like Oprah's Favorite things - if Oprah was really cheap. And loved to shop at Kohl's.  Now, let me make clear that I am not hawking or reviewing products here.  Nobody's paying me or providing me with anything. LTTMMSE is just a little outlet for me to exclaim over and dissect little materialistic things that make me ridiculously excited.  Sidenote:  It doesn't take much, people.    

Grab the button below and link on up in the comments if you want to make your own list! I'd love to read what makes you STUPID excited too!!  And if you'd like to see my past lists, they're all linked up here.

Little Things That Make Me Stupid Excited


I've got eight stupid fabulous things for the month of December!  It's a bit holiday focused, but as I love to say, 'Tis the season!

Are you ready?  Then let's begin!


How do I love thee, Peppermint Bark?  Let me count the ways. 

(1)  I love to eat you.
(2)  And then eat some more of you. 
(3)  And then eat some more of you after that. 
(4)  Are you sensing a pattern here?

Unfortunately, the good people at Ghiradelli consider you a "holiday" candy and therefore only make you available seasonally.  But what a glorious season it is!


One of my best friends gave me the above necklace as a thank you gift for taking photographs of her family a few weeks ago.  I insisted that no payment was necessary, that I was thrilled she asked me to take their pictures in the first place, and that I learned a ton of stuff from the photo shoot and that was payment enough.  But tricky little Anne went ahead and got me something anyway.  And I loooooooooooooove it.  I'm thinking of standing on the corner now with a sign saying "Will Take Photographs for Jewelry".  Think people will go for it?  Thank you again, Annie!  I am stupid excited to wear this thing!!!


Um, hello.  Is this wreath not the cutest thing EVER?  I am totally going to try and make it.  What could possibly go wrong?  Wait - don't answer that.  I'm not sure what my obsession is with making wreaths out of food items lately.  I wonder what I'll make for New Years....can you make a wreath out of empty liquor bottles?


Now I know makeup and lotions and everything are all a very personal decision.  But I gotta tell you, I love this stuff.  I just recently bought it and am so glad I did.  It's kind of like a tinted moisturizer, I guess is the best way to describe it.  It's very light, blends super easily, and just looks great as a base coat for your face.  I usually touch up with a bit of foundation after putting this stuff on, but I'm not even sure I really need to.  I've been struggling lately with makeup due to my aforementioned aging issues, and I think I finally struck gold with this purchase.  Now watch them go and discontinue it.  That would make me stupid angry.


I just finished reading all of these books a few weeks ago, and man, I loved them.  The premise had me hooked right from the get-go, and this author knows how to tell a good story, so I pretty much couldn't put them down.

They're young adult, so don't go into them expecting a literary masterpiece.  And in the interest of full disclosure, they're also pretty depressing.  But don't we all need to be depressed once in awhile?  Sometimes I think it's good for the constitution.  But even so, maybe it's best to wait until January to read these so as not to dampen your Christmas spirit. 


Isn't this just so pretty?  I love this Nativity set.  I've had it for years, and I just think it's so timeless. Although I still don't have the creche piece, because it is dang expensive.  Baby Jesus certainly couldn't have afforded it, which is kind of ironic, if you think about it.


What's this?  Oh, only the greatest Christmas music album ever made!!!  Mele Kalikimaka is my favorite.  Mele Kalikimaka is the thing to say, on a bright Hawaiian Christmas day.....  Oh, it's just so festive!


Holiday Dresses for Little Girls

I found the above dresses at JC Penney, but there are tooooooooooons of cute holiday dresses out there right now for little girls at pretty much any clothing store you can think of.  I'm not a huge fan of frills and bows, but something about Christmas brings out my inner pageant mom.  Luckily for Ashley's sake, she only shows up once a year.  But come on - aren't those dresses darling?  I'm especially partial to the first one with the hearts.


And that's it for this month!  Hope you all enjoyed it!


Tuesday, November 30, 2010

I'm ready to tire now. Does this mean I can re-tire soon?

My birthday is in a few weeks.  I'll be turning 35.

{pause for dramatic effect}

That's right.  35.  Mid-thirties.  Half-way to dead. 

Funny how most days I still feel like I'm 16.  A very responsible 16 year old, but still.

In my (almost) 35 years on this planet, I feel like I've accomplished a lot.  Yes, there's a lot of stuff still left to do, but considering that I will become old and decrepit in a few weeks, I'm going to focus on my past accomplishments.  Making a to-do list will just make me more tired, and I need to conserve my energy for the years ahead.

So, without further ado, here is my list of:

11 Things That I Have Accomplished In 35 Years

1.  Graduated from law school.  Which maybe this should be on the list of things I'm not necessarily glad I did.  But who cares - it was hard, so on the list of accomplishments it goes.

2.  Passed the bar exam.  I will never study for anything again.

3.  Married the love of my life (i.e., Scott, just in case you weren't sure).

4.  Kept three children alive since 2005.  I'm not making any promises for the future, but so far so good.

5.  Co-authored a book that was published.  A dang boring book about legal stuff, but I say it counts.

6.  Traveled to some pretty interesting foreign places.  Egypt, Israel, Italy, Greece, Germany, and Tijuana.  Probably had the most fun in TJ.

7.  Took my love and took it down.  Climbed a mountain then I turned around.  And I saw...wait, those are the lyrics to Landslide.

8.  Lived at Mission Beach in San Diego during my junior and senior year of college.  Watched many beautiful ocean sunsets.  And a few sunrises too, wink wink. 

9.  Watched every single episode of Blue's Clues ever made.  This was unintentional, but an accomplishment nonetheless.

10.  Started the Beanie Baby craze of the 90's.  I can't prove this, but I'm telling you, it all started with me and my after-school job at the Village Toymaker in 1993. 

11.  Won "Funniest Blog" in the 2010 Multiple and More Blog Awards.  Except I haven't done that yet.  But you could help me by clicking here, scrolling down and voting for Twinsomnia.  You can vote once per day!

(I'm totally losing right now.  Help an (almost) 35 year old's dream come true, will you?  Do it for the elderly!)


Sunday, November 28, 2010

Two Posts in One Day? What!?

I know, two posts in one day!  It's unheard of for me! 


I just found out my blog was nominated for "Funniest Blog" over at the Multiples and More Second Annual Blog Awards!!!!!


Please vote for me by clicking here - then scroll down until you see the poll for "Funniest Blog" and vote for Twinsomnia.  You can vote for me once each day until December 5th at 9pm EST.

I am SOOOOO excited!!!!!  I was nominated in this category last year and came in last place.  *sniff*   Which I was still insanely excited about, but hoo boy it would be fun to win it all this year!  Help me out by voting, will ya?


Thanksgiving Recap, With a Few Random Digressions

Oof, I am still recovering from Thanksgiving.  In fact, I just finished washing the china tonight.  True story.

Everything turned out delish.  My parents and I split up food-making duties, with my mom and dad handling the turkey and secret family stuffing and mashed potatoes and me handling the sweet potatoes and green bean casserole and pumpkin pie.

Although, technically, my parents did have help from Ashley and Owen on the secret family stuffing.   My family looooooves this stuffing.  And it's a rite of passage for the kids in our family to help make it because it involves a lot of bread squishing and well, kids love to squish.  This is the first year Owen helped.


He looks a mite concerned, doesn't he?  I think he was worried he'd have to taste it.  Which, silly Owen, you don't get to taste the stuffing until it's fully cooked, give or take a couple of hours.  Also, stuffing tasting by children is not allowed unless an adult is willing to share, and well, nobody usually is. 

Aidan didn't participate in the stuffing preparation.  Instead, he laid prostrate on the kitchen floor for some reason that I'm sure seemed really important to a three-year old at the time but that none of us can remember now.  You know, it was probably because I made him drink out of the green cup instead of the blue cup at breakfast.  O, la tragedia!


Random Sidenote:  I know I've spoken of Aidan's hair troubles before on the blog.  But, I don't think I've talked about how Aidan's hair is one of the easiest ways you can tell the twins apart.  See, when Aidan's hair gets too long, the back of it swirls into a cyclone shape, which one of my friends aptly dubbed "The Tornaidan".  You can totally see it in this picture. 


So, if you ever come to visit us, now you know how to tell the twins apart.  [/end random sidenote]

Okay, enough digressing!  In addition to all the food-making, Ashley and I crafted up some Thanksgiving place cards.  When I first asked her if she knew what a place card was, she told me "Sure, mommy.  A pa-lace card is when a police man sends you a card in the mail because it is a nice thing to do."  Which, fair enough.  So then I told her I meant to ask her if she knew what a place card was, and then we were off and running.  


They turned out cute, no?  Ashley wrote everybody's names once I spelled them out for her.  Luckily everyone had short names, because those turkey place cards are not very roomy, are they. 


The table turned out looking pretty nice too.  Again, I failed at taking pictures of the food because I was too busy eating.  But what can you do.  I hope you all had a lovely Thanksgiving too!

P.S.  I got an insane amount of blog hits on Thanksgiving on my Thanksgiving Status Update post.  It was bigger than my SITS day, no joke, people.  Unfortunately, I did not see anyone use any of my incredibly clever and witty status updates on Facebook.  Oh well.  I'll just have to up my game for Christmas.

Thursday, November 25, 2010

Happy Thanksgiving!



Happy Thanksgiving, everyone!  While I'm thankful out the cornucopia for many things this year, I wanted to say a special thank you to all of you who read my blog on a regular basis.  I love to write, and having you all continue to read it, just means a lot.  So thank you.  Thank you for reading.  And I hope you keep coming back for more.


Monday, November 22, 2010

You Can Pick Your Friends, You Can Pick Your Nose, But You Can't Pick Your Friend's Nose. Unless You Use a Booger Ghost.

The twins are learning about super important stuff in preschool this week.  Take today's handout, for example.


As I understand it, you generally cannot pick your nose.  Instead, you must blow your nose into a tissue.  HOWEVER.  If you get a crusty hard green booger in your nose that refuses to be blown outward, you can make a little tissue coat for your finger known as a "Booger Ghost" to remove the offending booger manually.

Good to know.

(I'm hoping the above illustrations are not drawn to scale, because that booger ghost does not look like it would fit comfortably up that kid's nostril.)

Also, Aidan explained, you should never eat your boogers, because that will give you a tummy ache.  Seems like that should've been on the handout too, but whatever.   

I have not asked either Aidan or Owen to demonstrate Booger Ghost usage yet, although it's on my list of things to do.  Although it doesn't really seem seasonally appropriate, you know?  I mean, it's not Halloween anymore.  It's Thanksgiving.


I know what to do.


We'll use a Booger Turkey instead.  It's perfect.

You're welcome for giving you another great holiday idea just in time for Thanksgiving.