So, I got an iPhone 4s a month or so ago from my work. I was so EXCITED. And one of the things I was the most excited about was having access to Siri, my very own personal assistant.
HOWEVER. Siri and I are having a bit of a personality conflict.
(It's not me, it's her.)
Like the other day, when I tried to call my parents.
Siri: What can I help you with?
Me: Call Mom and Dad. (This is how I have my parents' home phone listed in my contacts - MomandDad.)
Siri: Which mom? Mom or Mom and Dad? (Mom is my mom's cell phone.)
Me: Mom and Dad.
Siri: Which mom? Mobile or work?
Me: No, I said Mom and Dad.
Siri: Okay, Megan. Calling Mom, mobile.
Me: NO! (I hang up and try again.)
Siri: What can I help you with?
Me: Call Mom and Dad.
Siri: Which mom? Mom or Mom and Dad?
Me: Mom and Dad.
Siri: Would you like me to remember that Mom and Dad is your mother?
Me: Uh, yes.
Siri: Got it, Megan. Mom and Dad is your mother.
Me: Great. Call my mother.
Siri: Which mother? Mom or Mom and Dad?
Me: Oh.My.God.
Siri: I don't see "God" in your address book. Should I look for businesses by that name?
You know the drill. Work has been kicking my arse. Also, I've finally accepted the fact that I cannot stay up later than 10:30 p.m., which is putting a crimp in my blogging time.
Maybe I will have to get up early and start writing in the morning. The horror! The horror!
Anywhoo, if you've missed me, you can check out a guest post I wrote for Nicole over at her new site, My Everything Else (she wrote formerly at Twins for the Show).
Go over, leave a comment, and let me know your user name if you want to play words with friends with me!! And follow Nicole while you're at it - her blog is awesome!
I called Scott the other day on my way home from work.
Me: Hey, what are you making for dinner tonight?
Scott: Fajitas.
Me: Ay yi yi yi yi yi yi! Awesome.
Scott: Were you just being Mexican or Indian?
Me: Uh, I am celebrating fajitas. Clearly I am being Mexican.
Scott: Well, it sounded Indian.
Me: What!? That was totally Mexican. Now if I was being Indian, I would have said Yi yi yi yi yi! See the subtle difference? One begins with an A and the other begins with a Y.
Scott: There is no Y in the Indian alphabet.
Me: Don't question my Indian knowledge, I am an expert on it.
Scott: Name two Indian tribes other than the Omaha and the Cherokee.
Me: That's easy - the Sioux and the Blackhawks.
Scott: One of those is a hockey team.
Me: Oh. Well, anyways, fajitas sound good.
I think I need to work on my culture awareness skills. And also my accents.
Well, my birthday was on Sunday. Scott and I went out to celebrate on Saturday night and just had a disaster evening. I wanted to go out to dinner in this quaint part of town called the Old Market and then go see this movie I've been dying to see - Melancholia - at the arty movie theater downtown.
Well.
Apparently everyone, their brothers, their sisters, their mothers, their fathers, their in-laws, their third cousins once removed, their college roommates, their old girl scout leaders and everyone else within a 50 mile radius of my city decided to go to the Old Market that night too. Because of a little thing called Christmas, I guess, which has once again proven that it is WAY too close to my birthday. GOD, Christmas. You are so flipping rude.
Anyway, we couldn't find parking for forever. Then we finally parked like 10 blocks away. Then we were late for our dinner reservations. Then by the time we were done with dinner, we had missed the movie. And then I was melancholy for Melancholia. Heh.
Anyway, Scott decided to cheer me up on Sunday, my actual birthday, by insisting that we finish the rest of my 36 things list THAT DAY. I was like "You straight up crazy," because in my mind I had already granted myself an extension to the end of the year. But then I thought, what the hell, this will be fun!
So we went for it.
4. Wash my minivan: DONE!
Scott took it in for me, since I have carwash-a-phobia. It's not a fear of the car wash itself, but the driving INTO the car wash part. You know, when you have to get your tire lined up on the track just so. (I have depth perception issues. Don't judge - it's a serious medical condition. To me.)
5. Eat a lot of peppermint bark: DONE!
This one was done early in the day, while I was still melancholy.
6. Go out on a date with my husband: DONE!
Did this one the night before - see sad story above.
7. Learn a dance with Ashley: DONE!
With video evidence, I might add.
9. Write a short story: DONE!
Kinda. Does this blog post count? It's sort of like a nonfiction story. Whatever, I'm going with it.
12. Finish reading Wuthering Heights: DONE! ALMOST! CLOSE ENOUGH!
I got through the Heathcliff/Catherine parts, so I say I'm done enough for high school english class, anyways. (P.S. Isn't it funny how in old novels they use verbs like "ejaculated" instead of "shouted"? Heh. Emily Bronte, you dirty girl.)
13. Take Aidan out for a date: DONE!
We had a little oreo backyard date.
(I paid).
14. Take Owen out for a date: DONE!
Owen and I had backyard cheez-its.
Only the best for my babies. Shhh-don't tell them I'm two-timing them.
15. Buy some new shoes: DONE!
I bought the kids their Christmas shoes last week. Yeah, I know they weren't shoes for ME but looking at the language I used up there, I just said I had to buy shoes, not that they had to be for me. So there you go, law school diploma. Thank you for being useful.
16. Learn how to make my mom's almond cake icing: DONE!
This one was easy peasy. All it is is 2 sticks of butter, 4 cups of powdered sugar, a tablespoon of milk and a tablespoon of almond extract. Mix it and enjoy.
17. Take a family picture with all five of us in it: DONE!
My mom took this pic of us at our family Christmas party on Friday night. We're all looking at the camera! Holy crap, it's a Christmas miracle!
18. Go out for strawberry margaritas: DONE!
There's nothing like a frozen strawberry margarita at 2:00 in the afternoon. I should really make this a weekend tradition, I think.
20. Make another wreath: DONE! WELL, I STARTED IT! AND THAT'S GOING TO HAVE TO DO, PEOPLE!
21. Watch that "Once Upon a Time" show: DONE!
Actually, I watched three of these while I was making the above-mentioned wreath. I think I like it. It's kinda weird, but I like weird shows, so I'm going to go with it.
22. Make homemade macaroni and cheese: DONE!
Well, technically, Scott made it a few weeks ago. But I ate it, so I say it counts.
25. Wear false eyelashes AND 32. Go out wearing bright red lipstick: DONE and DONE!
Yeah, so I only went out on my front porch. It totally counts. Also, FYI - when buying false eyelashes, please make sure to also buy false eyelash ADHESIVE to stick the things on with. Otherwise you might be forced to stick them on with lipgloss, like I did. Nothing but class over here, ladies.
29. Drink hot chocolate with marshmallows in it: DONE!
Quite a few times, actually. What! It's cold here.
30. Slow dance with my husband: DONE!
Got this one checked off yesterday, no problemo.
31. Figure out how to display our family photos on the wall: DONE!
Did this one awhile ago too, just haven't gotten around to posting about it yet.
33. Eat sushi: DONE!
Had sushi takeout for dinner last night. In the immortal words of David Lee Roth, I wish they all could be California rolls.... Ba dum dum.
34. Plan a vacation: DONE!
Kinda. I "plan" to take a vacation this year. Close enough.
35. Rearrange the furniture in the living room: DONE!
I did this the same day I arranged the family pictures. Maybe one day I shall post about it.
ANNNNNNNNND, drum roll please!
36. Turn 36. And try not to cry about it: DONE!
Well, I might have cried a little. But not very much, because I was so dang busy yesterday doing all this stuff. Boy, that Scotty is a smart boy, is he not? I think I married the king of distraction.
Santa came to my house on Sunday. Seriously, he did.
One of my friends bid on him at an auction type fundraiser thingy a few months ago. Totally legit, I swear. Anyway, she won, so Santa was required to come entertain her at a place and time of her choosing. And since she's awesome - and also because she probably didn't want to spend an afternoon having a cozy tête-à -tête with Santa - she decided to share him with all of our kids.
So my friends and I planned a little shindig for our families, but we didn't tell the kids that Santa would be coming. We said we were just going to have Christmas cookies and what not, whatev, no big deal. Oooh - Christmas subterfuge!
Anyways, we were all on the edge of our seats waiting for Santa to show up at 1:00 sharp. Well, my girlfriends and I were. Our husbands were all in the other room talking about sports or maybe cars or other boy stuff. Seriously, it was like a junior high party. The girls in one room, the boys in the other. Although come to think of it, the boys chose the same room that the Christmas cookies were in. Sneaky bastards.
The kids were all upstairs playing, so the plan was that Santa would just come on in, let out a "Ho Ho Ho!" and then the kids would appropriately FREAK THE EFF OUT. But unfortunately, I forgot that my house has windows. So they all saw Santa pull up in his car in the driveway. Oh well!
They were all still quite excited anyway, although Owen did ask me suspiciously "Mommy, where are Santa's reindeer?" I told him maybe he dropped them off at a farm to let them have a drink or something. What! I was under pressure.
Anyway, all of the mommies got out their cameras and totally flash stunned Santa when he came in the door.
But then he got comfy and settled down to business.
Ashley volunteered to go up to see him first. Shocker, I know. She said she wanted one of the bells from his sleigh - totally copped from Polar Express. Santa has apparently never seen Polar Express and sounded a little wierded out about her gift choice, so he talked her into a My Little Pony instead.
Owen was decked out in his Buzz Lightyear gear since it was Halloweena special occasionSunday a typical day of the week. He asked Santa for slippers. Gotta teach that boy to dream a little bigger, no?
Aidan asked for the "fastest choo-choo train in the world!" Not sure where that came from. Last time I asked him what he wanted he told me a Light Bright, dangit.
Anyway, we had a lot of fun. My kids could not stop talking about how Santa "CAME TO THEIR HOUSE!!!!!!" Hopefully they'll be just as impressed when we see Santa again (different make and model) at my family's Christmas party this weekend. I'm a little nervous there may be a few questions about why Santa looks and sounds different than when he was at our house. Short-term memories, don't fail me now!
Well...my birthday is next week. YIKES, I have a lot left to do.
But, so far I've finished the following:
19. Bake cookies: Done!
23. Take a day off just for me: Done!
Kinda. I took Friday off to go to Ashley's Christmas program. I may have worked from home, but just a little.
24. Drive around and look at Christmas lights: Done!
Did this the other day...didn't have my camera on me. Boo.
27. Watch "The Polar Express" with the kids: Done!
Watched this last night on the Disney channel. I'd never seen it before and totally cried like a baby. Oh, how he belived at the end! And then Josh Groban sang "Believe"! It was too much. (The kids thought I was psychotic.)
Anyways, I'm moving right along! Kinda, considering I only have one week left. But you know me, I love a challenge.
Ah, the holidays. There are so many awesome things about them, not the least of which is getting to dress my kids up in holiday outfits. Love! My kids are going to be decked out in Target gear this year. Seriously, they had some dang cute stuff in stock.
I bought Ashley this sweet little sweater dress - it's more silvery than white in person.
And these sparkly shoes to go with them. OH, how I want a pair for myself!!!!!!!!!!
The boys will be wearing matching holiday sweaters. It's my right as a mother of twins to dress them that way. Trust me, I've earned it.
The standard go-to khaki's...
And these cute little shoes!
When I came home with them Scott was all "WHERE are they going to wear those shoes?" And I said, "They'll wear them on Christmas!" And then he said "But where ELSE will they wear them?" And I said "Uh...church?" And then he laughed at me because we never go to church. But let me tell you, we just might start, that's how cute these shoes are!
As for me, I'm trying to think of any excuse I can to go buy this little number from Kohl's.
I have nowhere to wear it to, but clearly that has never stopped me before.
